Catching up

It's been much too long since I've posted. It's been so busy here - I am really feeling the pressure of time. There is so much to do and not enough time to do it in! Last weekend, the 2nd session volunteers left. I was sad to see them go, and I have missed them. It was difficult for the children, as well. On the evening before they left, one of the boys in my house wouldn't speak to one of the male volunteers, because he was so unhappy that he was leaving. This was tough on Drew, the volunteer, and it was so difficult for Gokulraj. He didn't want anyone to see, but he was wiping away tears. He would only talk to me, because I wasn't leaving. Eventually, he opened up and talked to Drew a little bit, but it was tough. Since then, the children have frequently asked me when I will go to America. When they know that it is not yet, they always smile very wide, but I dread having to leave them so soon. I am coming to know more and more of their names, and am feeling greater love for them with every day. I wonder sometimes about how hard it must be for them to always have people leaving. I am amazed at how quickly they open their hearts to new people, when they are constantly having to let old ones go. I wish that they could have more stability in the adults in their lives. They learn too early to rely on themselves, but they still embrace and love those who come into their lives, however short they are here.

Another thing that happened this week was that my best friend among the housemothers, Rajakumari, left. She is living at home now with her parents, although I at least still get to see her during the day because she is still teaching science. I know that this may be easier for her - she was doing so much, with teaching all day, looking after 22 girls in the morning and at night, and working on her master's degree through correspondence in her nonexistent spare time - but it was still very hard to leave. I found her in tears at the end of last week. She told me that although she had to this some time ago, because she wants to be able to do a special science class in the mornings for older children preparing for the state exams, she still did not want to go. She did not want to live at home with her parents, where there is domestic abuse (a common problem in India, especially rural India). She didn't want to leave the children that she loved and cared for. I miss her a lot - I have spent most of my evenings after dinner in her "house," working with her on English and helping her to plan lessons. She is reading Charlotte's Web, and she likes me to read a page and then she reads the same page. I correct her pronunciation and help her to understand words that she doesn't know. She is a wonderful woman - 22 years old and doing incredible things.

Many of the people here are quite remarkable. There is one housemother who just turned 28 years old. She is a widow - her husband was killed at the beginning of this year. She has a 12 year old son (going on about 30 - he is definitely in teenager mode) and a 9 year old son. Her husband was abusive. She was married when she was 14 years old. She is very intelligent. She speaks fluent Hindi as well as Tamil, which is unusual in this area, and her English is among the best of any of the Indians here at Rising Star. However, she was not able to receive an education as a child, and she really wanted to learn to read and write, so now she studies every night. She can remember most of the letter sounds now, and she is beginning to be able to sound out words and read very simple books. The volunteers try to help her when we can. She is an amazing woman.

I am really in a groove now at the school. Every day is full to the brim. I teach about 3 or 4 periods every day on average, as a model, while the teacher in the classroom watches. I meet with teachers to critique and provide suggestions and assistance, as well as to help them with lesson planning. I observe teachers and am doing teacher evaluation as well. I am really enjoying what I am doing, even if I am really busy. I feel like I've gotten over a hump and I feel very comfortable at the school and with the teachers now. They seek me out for help, I provide trainings each Tuesday at teacher meeting, and I get to see them a lot one-on-one and in small groups in the staff room. The children all know me, too, and they enjoy seeing the "English ma'am." They all ask me when I will come to teach in their classes again when they see me. Kanmani loves to tell me the good news when he has a day with no "x" for behavior problems, which means he gets a star on his behavior chart, and a tiny girl in UKG (kindergarten - I think she is 3, but she might be 4), always runs to jump into my arms each day at interval when she sees me (interval is recess). She doesn't speak English except for "yes," but every time she sees me she shouts "ma'am!" and starts running.

Tonight, at 3 am, we leave for Chennai, where we will fly to Delhi for our weekend trip. We will go to Agra and see the Taj Mahal. I am quite excited. I will update you on that trip, hopefully very soon.